By JP-16, 5 June 2008

When I was in eighth grade, I met Tracy, a friend whose mom was a severe alcoholic and a heavy smoker. As we were good friends, I often went to Tracy’s house, and, as eighth graders often are, we’d be loud, make a mess, and be a bit naughty. But every time Tracy’s mom caught her
"misbehaving," or forgetting to do small things like offer water to me when I arrived, she would shake her head in disappointment, and mutter to Tracy to “be an adult.” And almost every time, as I unintentionally overheard her scold Tracy, I would wonder, what does she mean by “be an adult”?

Her mom smokes, drinks, has a bad temper and is oftentimes too harsh to Tracy. Is that an adult?

What does it mean to act like an adult?

Over the past few years, I have found myself asking that question numerous times.

While the legal age of adulthood is 18, is everyone above that age more “adult-like” than teenagers? There are many cases of Chinese government officials actually stealing emergency aid supplies from the victims of the Sichuan earthquake. Are they acting like adults?

There are workers who dedicate their lives to making the lives of others better. Are they acting like adults? When a teenager like Craig Kielberger makes a difference in the world, is he or she an adult?

Who is an adult? Is it right that my friend rationalizes his habit of drinking and bullying with, “Well, I’m not an adult yet”? When someone tells a kid to “grow up” or “act more like an adult,” what does that mean?

I allowed those questions to roll around in my head. After asking other people, I realized that I was not the only one confused by that.

Finally, I concluded that “adulthood” was not a finite stage in life; rather it is best defined as when you are giving the best of you.

When someone says “grow up,” you aren’t supposed to try and copy the behaviors of someone older than you. When someone says to “act like an adult.” you don’t literally do so. What you do instead of looking outward, is to look inward. You look at yourself, and see what parts of you you can develop, what character traits you can cultivate and develop to become a more mature person who is aware of what goes on around you. So when anyone reminds you to “act like an adult,”think of ways you could have responded better to the situation or environment you are in. Take it as an opportunity to develop yourself, regardless of how old you are.


Click here for June contest on Defining What Makes Us Happy:
http://www.icubed.us/node/gallery/1065

Please click here to read "June 2008 Editorial Theme: GRADUATION & BECOMING ADULT ... by Margaret Chen, Editor-in-Chief"